Though pleased with the warm reception to my particularly verbose first post, I was a little taken back by an instance of trolldom that accompanied it.
A mate on facebook got the frapes, and his frapist commented on my blog post with the usual 'same bro' rhetoric. I've had this done to me before, yet I always confuse it for genuine interest, as a troll would hope. Notice that it always happens when someone commits honest effort into something creative or sincere, and that's my main problem with trolls.
Just yesterday, when Team Four Star released their long overdue new episode 28, my compy was having trouble playing it, so I looked around YouTube to see if some desperate person had already mirrored it. However the desperation was on another level; all I could find were fake videos, normally with a still image and nonsensical background music.
I remember when people first started making these for Little Kuriboh's videos, but this was the first time I just sat down and watched one. Whilst I can't say real effort goes into them, I'm struck at the sheer wasted amount of time just to grab a few thousand YouTube hits.
Call me mad bro but I for one am sick of the acceptance and toleration we give these people who aren't just incapable of contributing, but contribute negativity.
And rather than write a shitty letter to an even worse news paper, I thought I'd blog it. Bitches.
I'm no stranger to trolls: I lived with one. Last year was a constant onslaught of shit jokes and insults, pre-packaged to avoid actual impact. And it's not just that, as a stand up, I abhor canned humour, and if you're reading this mate I bear no ill will (after all most of the time the joke was on you), but the troll seems to know little else but what he does, and I'm just trying to figure out why.
I'd love a psychologist to examine a troll, to get behind the reliance on outdated references and catchphrases said at such verbatim that you wonder if he has a pull string at the back. Or the front. :)
There's no doubt some serious shit going on in the back-story for some trolls. Take Shock of God, an internet religious nut who posted some logically incoherent question to all non-believers, then, instead of responding rationally, posted their videos context-free so he could claim some shallow victory over them. As he censors comments and produces the same drivel constantly, his YouTube hits hardly ever rise above 10,000...so what was he trying to accomplish? Was he deep down insecure about his faith, and felt drawing miniscule attention and rage helped soothe the wound?
It's likely a de-individuation thing. There's the infamous Penny Arcade cartoon explaining the mathematics of the troll, and I think they're right on the money. You have a total sense of anonymity, coupled with a large community who not only share your facelessness, but who also brand themselves with it, and you have your website as your dominant authority figure.
Maybe it's a cult thing. Maybe if I went into my old house mate's room and looked at his bare ass (would probably have to explain myself first...) I'd find the troll/cool face tattooed on one cheek. Suddenly I'd find myself surrounded by robed figures, who, for uncovering their thousand year order, would now decide my fate, which could potentially be worse than death.
I hate to pull the classic 'I don't hate you I pity you' card, but I could pull it out of Penn Jilette's ass. When an entire sect defines themselves as copypasta chefs, or keeps a golden folder full of faces to suit the mood, I can only use the word tool. Hell, add and subtract some letters and you're not far off.
I'm gonna play reverse psychologist and bait trolls who read this to respond with 'problem?' or 'you mad bro?'. Do so, and accept your lack of originality as the internet's rent boy. Don't, and prove that you're an actual human being.